There are certain people that just seem to have ‘it’. They are the type of people that everyone notices when they step in the room…the life of the party. As a natural leader, they seem to attract all the right kind of people at the right time.
We all know someone who has ‘it’.
The question is, how can you become more like those people? Can it be learned? Or is it something that you’re born with? Well, at the end of the day, the people that have ‘it’ really are able to do one thing: command presence.
Commanding presence isn’t something that can be learned overnight. It takes time and effort. And it also might be more difficult for some people, and less so for others. However, it’s a skill that is invaluable. We’ve put together four crucial factors that go into commanding presence:
It really all starts with your attitude. That’s the foundation of cultivating a commanding presence. If you constantly have a negative mentality, then it’ll be impossible to have confidence in what you’re doing.
To illustrate this point, imagine if someone was driving a NASCAR race car but didn’t believe he could go over 90 mph. Well, guess how fast that car would go? 90 mph. The driver’s limiting beliefs disabled the vehicle’s ability to drive at its capable speed of 200 miles per hour.
In life, it’s the same way. If you have a poor attitude and don’t have confidence to push yourself and grow, you’ll not fully live out your potential. Once again, in order to command a presence, you’ve got to keep your attitude positive.
The next step is to have proper eye contact. This is very important. Can you recall a past conversation with someone who’s eyes were constantly wandering?
It’s very hard to pay attention to someone with shifty eyes. And whatever they’re saying doesn’t really seem to have any truth behind it.
Eyes are the window to the soul, so you mustn’t brush over this step!
In order to command presence, you really need to square up and look at the person you’re speaking with. Focus intently on what they’re saying. And when you are speaking, use your eye contact to channel assertive energy towards them.
Listen…Don’t Just Hear
Unless you’re deaf, you can hear. However, this doesn’t mean that you are listening. Multi-billionaire Richard Branson mentions this important distinction in his book on leadership, The Virgin Way (click here to get it).
In fact, he states in his book that his ability to listen is one of his most beneficial activities, not only in business, but in life. Really trying to understand what someone is saying and spending more time listening rather than speaking is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign that you care, and will cause you to learn much as you go through life.
Lastly, in order to cultivate a commanding presence, you really have to look the part. This includes both your posture and attire. If you’re hunched over, and wearing ill-fitting clothing, then no one’s really going to take you seriously.
Wearing clothing that looks sharp (click here for young professional fashion tips) and standing with a confident posture will make it much easier for you to get to the point of commanding a solid presence.
So there you have it: four actionable tips and how you can begin to command presence and boost your charisma.